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Jul. 11th, 2005 | 08:54 am

Oh... how true it is.........


This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.

Repost this if you're a nice guy
Girls Repost if you're lookin for this/or appreciate these guys

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Comments {13}

FeralJess

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from: feraljess
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 12:56 pm (UTC)
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/toast

i appreciate these kind of guys :) they're hard to find though, more often than not, they're bad guys disguised as the nice ones :P

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Don

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from: shoshiki
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 01:03 pm (UTC)
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I wear no disguises..... at least I don't think I do?

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sparrow with a machine gun

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from: maereth
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 02:00 pm (UTC)
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I've seen this thing a billion times and it pisses me off each time. See, the problem with nice guys like that is that they assume that just because they are nice, those girls who are their friends owe them a romantic relationship, which makes them just as bad as the jerks they date. Girls who are friends with nice guys appreciate them as friends, and they are not owed anything more. A girl does not have to sleep with you just because you're nice to her, if you don't want to hear her cry about her boyfriend then don't be her friend, because no one needs friends like that.

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Don

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from: shoshiki
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 02:21 pm (UTC)
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Usually it is the nice guys who will, after being a friend for a while.. and seeing the heataches the friend is going though... Try and ask that person out, or, will have asked the girl out in the past...
No, they are not OWED anything.. But, it'd be nice for a nice guy to win every now and then... I mean... you girls can't ALL want assholes... right??

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sparrow with a machine gun

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from: maereth
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 04:12 pm (UTC)
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My boyfriend is a nice guy who won me. It's easy to see all the girls with asshole boyfriends and think "but why don't they like meeeeeee?" but you're not counting all the nice guys who have already won, because they are much more silent.

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Rei

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from: spydrei
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 11:46 pm (UTC)
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I agree too, but then there are some girls that do just jerk around nice guys.
When you stop looking that you'll find the right person. They'll be the one who sneaks up and wiggles their way into your heart while you're still busy looking at the cutie on the bus.

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sparrow with a machine gun

(no subject)

from: maereth
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 05:46 pm (UTC)
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Besides which, you're not counting all the women out there who sit and watch the girls who manage to show the most skin be the ones who get hit on all the time. There's a parallel for women on this, too.

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Autumn

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from: somethingumist
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 02:57 pm (UTC)
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i agree with this above comment. and by the way don, you have posted this same entry in here a zillion times now.

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Don

(no subject)

from: shoshiki
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 03:00 pm (UTC)
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I have??

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i am not peter wanko

(no subject)

from: freshyoungflesh
date: Jul. 11th, 2005 08:21 pm (UTC)
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as a girl...
my problem is, the girls who have a billion nice guys in love with them and love to keep them hanging around because they think its nice to have all that attention. with no intention of ever dating them. then date the assholes that treat them like crap. cut the nice guys loose for girls who WILL give them a chance!

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Don

(no subject)

from: shoshiki
date: Sep. 6th, 2005 05:13 am (UTC)
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lol.. I usually end up getting burned no matter which way I turn though..

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(no subject)

from: adelphian
date: Jul. 12th, 2005 11:17 pm (UTC)
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I married the nice guy.

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Don

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from: shoshiki
date: Sep. 6th, 2005 05:12 am (UTC)
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nuh uh!! cause I am still single! :-P lol

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